The recent Synod on Synodality used a new practice to engage participants in healthy and constructive conversations. As described in the Instrumentum Laboris shared prior to the first gathering of the Synod in October 2023, “Conversations in the Spirit” was the tool used most at the table groups, ultimately leading to the civil dialogue and results of the Synod.
In the class I’m teaching this summer in Santa Clara University’s Graduate Program in Pastoral Ministries, titled “Shared Leadership in a Synodal Church,” “Conversations in the Spirit” will be our guide as we begin to discover synodal practices for parish life. As part of the course, we will practice these skills in an instructive setting to help the pastoral leaders taking the class translate these attitudes and behaviors into their own ministries.
The goal of “Conversations in the Spirit” is to help all the faithful be more discerning when living out the mission of the Catholic Church under the guidance of the Holy Spirit, while also lifting up voices that are often set aside, marginalized, or whose experiences are frequently ignored in church leadership structures.
Although this was modeled in a Vatican Synod, what is still missing is how we translate these practices in realistic and practical ways into our local communities—namely, the parish. The hope is to create an atmosphere that makes shared discernment a reality.
Below is the process outlined by the Synod, along with how we might practice it in our local context:
- Personal Preparation: The first phase of “Conversations” takes place alone and in relationship with God. This happens before we even gather for our meeting. However, attendees must know what questions are going to be asked prior to the meeting taking place. This is why it is critical that the agenda be sent at least 48 to 72 hours in advance so there is time for this preparation. Whether it is a parish staff meeting, a finance council meeting, or a youth ministry core team meeting, sending the agenda out beforehand is key to helping people prepare and take the topics to prayer. The purpose of this personal preparation time is often to help surface further questions for discussion, rather than simply jumping to solutions.
- Silence and Prayer: This is key to every step of the process. We don’t simply move from reflection and words to dialogue without allowing space for the Spirit to work. Just like the Mass, where silence is built into the rubrics of the liturgy, so too must we allow silence to take hold in the loud world we live in.
- Taking the word and listening: This is often a timed experience, where everyone receives a set amount of time (such as 3 minutes) to share what they reflected on in their personal preparation. Keeping this timed ensures that no single voice dominates the process, though it requires strong facilitation to stop people once their time is up. Everyone shares their own thoughts from their reflection, not a response to what another person said. The goal is to listen to understand, not to listen to respond. There are no responses to another person’s statement in this section.
- Silence and Prayer: This allows us to sit with what we have heard thus far.
- Making Space for Others and the Other: This time is used to share what others have said that resonates with us, or even to share where we feel resistance to what was said. This is not about agreeing or disagreeing, but rather sharing where the Spirit is creating energy within us. Again, this is timed so everyone has an equal opportunity to share. Three minutes continues to be a good time limit here.
- Silence and Prayer: Again, we sit and allow the Spirit to move within us.
- Building Together: This is where true discernment takes place. After everyone has shared their initial thoughts and questions, and then reflected on what others have said, we begin to discern: what steps is the Holy Spirit calling us together? Decisions can be made at this point as consensus builds around concrete steps or choices. It is important to note that consensus does not always mean everyone agrees on every detail; rather, it means everyone can live with the decision and chooses to stand behind it, knowing the Spirit helped lead the process.
I highly recommend that this process be instituted in meetings where decisions are being made. Parish staff meetings and pastoral/finance council meetings are prime opportunities to live this process out.
Doing so requires orientation so everyone understands the framework before you implement it, which means we must provide training on “Conversations in the Spirit.” This also requires a high level of trust. Given that individuals from around the world who had never met were able to live out this process at the Vatican without prior relationships, I am confident that parish leaders who already know and serve with one another can do this exceptionally well.
Question: What’s stopping you from trying this out in your parish?
